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  • Bedtime Story

    The Ugly Duckling:

    Once upon a time in the 2002 NFL draft, the Cincinatti Bengals had to draft seven players, and Marvin "Mother Duck" Lewis had to decide which players were good eggs and which players were Rotten Eggs. One nice morning, Mother Duck chose six chirpy ducklings. But one egg was bigger than the rest, and it didn't hatch. Mother Duck couldn't recall laying that seventh egg. How did it get there? TOCK! TOCK! The little prisoner was pecking inside his shell.


    "Did I count the eggs wrongly?" Mother Duck wondered. But before she had time to think about it, the last egg finally hatched. A strange looking duckling with long dreadlocks that should have been stronger gazed at a worried mother. The ducklings grew quickly, but Mother Duck had a secret worry.


    "I can't understand how this ugly duckling can be one of mine!" she said to herself, shaking her head as she looked at her last born. Well, the duckling with the long dreadlocks certainly wasn't pretty, and since he ate far more than his brothers, he was outgrowing them. As the days went by, the poor ugly duckling started to suck more and more at football. His brothers didn't want to play with him, he was so clumsy, and all of his teammates simply laughed at him. He felt sad and lonely, while Mother Duck did her best to console him.


    "Poor little ugly duckling!" she would say. "Why are you so different from the others?" And the ugly duckling felt worse than ever. He secretly wept at night. He felt nobody wanted him.

    "Nobody loves me, they all tease me! Why am I different from my brothers?"


    Then one day, he ran away from the Cincinatti Bengals. He tried to get other Mother Duck's to take him in, but they just looked at him and laughed they're butts off.


    "We don't know anyone as ugly as you." Jon Gruden said. The ugly duckling did not lose heart, however, and kept on making inquiries. He went to another team, where a pair of large geese gave him the same answer to his question. What's more, they warned him: "Don't stay here! Go away! The NFL is too dangerous for you. Start acting like a man you big baby!" Orlando Pace told him. The duckling was sorry why he had ever left the Bengals.


    Then, one day, he went to Nashville, and Mother Duck Jeff Fisher of the Tennessee Titans took him under his wing. "You will grow and grow until your like the other ducklings".


    The Ugly Duckling improved at first, and he even scored a touchdown in his first game as a Tennessee Titan. However, his little duckling body were not growing fast enough and he was still considered weak among his peers.


    Finally, after 3 long years of the Ugly Duckling missing tackle after tackle, and being too slow to be considered a real Duckling. Mother Duck Jeff Fisher called him into his office.


    Mother Duck Jeff Fisher told him.
    "YOUR SO DANG UGLY I TRIED TO PUT YOU ON THE MAP
    BUT YOU TACKLE LIKE A GIRL AND PLAY LIKE CRAP
    I'M SICK AND TIRED ALL YOU DO IS POUT
    SO THAT'S WHY I'M THROWING YOUR (behind) OUT!".


    He will be remembered all over Nashville/
    as the guy who came in and played like roadkill/
    so when you are angry at the player you taunt/
    just always remember: "At least he isn't Lamont."


    By the way he's playing in Jacksonville now for Mother Duck Jack Del Rio, where they have lots of ugly ducklings.

  • #2
    poop

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    • #3
      I like the creativity...
      WalterFootball.com Forum Moderator




      Siena NFL ATS Record(TBD)
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      • #4
        This isn't a good bedtime story. Had I actually read this story I can guarantee I would have had horrendous nightmares.


        R.I.P. Sean Taylor 1983-2007
        HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!

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        • #5
          I don't get the purpose of putting effort into something like this. ;-__-

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          • #6
            me neither but I respect the effort.

            All of your pictures made since except Marty Schotenhimer and then you mentioned Jon Gruden.

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            • #7
              thread is lulz

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              • #8
                you wouldn't get it unless your a titans fan

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                • #9
                  I loved how you referred to Marvin Lewis as "she" in the second paragraph.
                  2016 NFL Mock Draft

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